When you first enter the theatre for I’m Not Saying We Should, But What If We Did? you’re greeted with a ‘good evening’ when it’s only just turned afternoon – and it gets more chaotic and disorientating from there. Until you figure out what’s actually going on (and oh, you’ve got a sticker to wear!).
Vibe
You’re been transported backstage into the chaotic vibe of a Saturday night TV show, with the cast and crew wandering about asking for lights and less volume – no LESS volume! Cables need picked up.
Where’s Maud and Agnes? Where’s the host?! Looks like we’re almost ready to roll.
The show itself
The premise of the show is that “violence against women is declared a national emergency, and celebrity politicians with their absurdist policies are at an all-time high”.
Female politicians Maud and Agnes (played by Harriet Pringle and Lizzie White) have finished one PR stunt and are onto their next – to take centre stage on a popular Saturday night TV show and discuss their controversial, ever-morphing policies around banning men, as well as making sweeping statements and swearing.
Whilst the pair are blustering through and talking about banning men, and banning football, and banning anyone over 45 from going out during the day, we’re regularly shown a bit of backstory about what’s happened to these women; and it’s all too relatable. From football-related violence, to dorm-room rape – there’s also real-life examples like Sarah Everard, which shook so many people at the time.
The statistics are there, and the pair make their argument to put a curfew on men, and ban football. To be honest, I’m not completely against it! It reminds me of The Perimeter, a short story by Chris Beckett where such a curfew on men has been put in place, with posters depicting women cowering under a raised masculine hand with the words ‘NEVER AGAIN’ emblazoned on them.
As the play goes on, Maud and Agnes continually adjust their makeup to appear more and more clown-like, with mascara crossing down to their cheeks, until we get to the final act when they’re also wearing little black and white clown hats. It’s very cleverly done, as the pair reassure their audience by repeatedly telling us “it’s always been on the cards” and “we’ve been saying this from the start”.
Overall
I really enjoyed I’m Not Saying We Should, But What If We Did? so much that I’ve wanted to talk about it with friends afterwards. The premise certainly makes you think, and with strong acting and tightly run show overall, I’d highly recommend it to anyone this Fringe.
I’m Not Saying We Should, But What If We Did?
Summary
A provocative, cleverly-written satirical play exploring populism and privilege under the guise of a proposed policy to ban men (and football). I love it.
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